sunday school

"what did you guys learn at church today?"

lucy said, "we learned about prayer"

abby said, "prayers...and fruit dacks!"

that's when i wish i was still in nursery class.


things you learn from a 2 year old

a stick of butter can be a great appetizer.

weeds make a great chair.

and sidewalk chalk can double as a bug squisher.



best candy ever

chocolate covered cinnamon bears. i know, sounds nasty right? well, that's exactly what i thought. you have to try them. really, before you die ask to try some before you kick the bucket. you won't regret it.

it took my roommate carrie almost an entire year to get me to try them. oh, and it was bliss. they are so good, and somehow my pregnant belly wants them every day. but not my thighs, my thighs definitely don't want them.

ps-i miss you carrie. i miss stopping by 2 times a day to see you at the candy counter. i miss getting free samples. lots and lots of free samples. mmm...i'm a foodie brain right now.


the name game

i am really enjoying the not 'knowing' part for the gender of the baby. why? because every day i can sit on my fat fanny and think up names to ward off boredom.

so far we have three fantastically (i know it's not a word) beautiful girl names.

we have no boy names. at least, not any that we can agree on. lucy did offer "max" to the table. but would that be for maxwell or maximillian?

i'm glad we can't name the baby before i see it because ty and i still argue over abigail's name. when i first saw her, and how tiny she was i wanted to name her after my great maternal grandmother Minnie. ty said, no, because we had already told everyone her name was abigail. plus we had paid $10 for a stocking that had 'abigail' on it that matched ours. yes, abby, one Lands End stocking was the deciding factor for your name. and i have wanted to call you minnie ever since. especially since you're so stinking small.

the only thing i can guarantee you is that the name will be easy to read, spell and pronounce. maybe it's from always feeling sorry for the kids in school where every substitute would say it wrong and the rest of us (including me) would giggle. or just knowing that my pregnant brain could never,ever, ever, in a million years, make up a name that would be better than the tried and true classics. as someone once said, "why does everyone try to reinvent the wheel?".

oh, and one time my cousin's friend made up a name for their daughter. well, it just so happened that the name in russian actually meant 'prostitute'. woops.

we did this

ty's parents and sister came up to visit the rest of us leavitts here in utah. it was grandma l's birthday and we had a grand celebration.
we really did have a nice weekend, wish i would have taken more pictures of the girls and them playing outside, great memories.

here's the birthday girl! i would be that happy too to have all my kids together in one place. but i love abby in the background directing grandpa as to how much dessert she wants. he he.

these two look related. what is up with lucy's scary smile?

trying to take a picture with ty. bread was more tempting
there we go. will someone please teach me how to take a picture without cocking my head? i just noticed i do that in 99.9% of photos. weird. and ty always has the best million dollar smile ever. except here, where he is chewing aforemention bread.
trying to catch evelyn's face after a bite of lemon. too funny. too bad i missed it.
after everyone went home abby asked,
"where did grandpa go?"
lucy answered: "they went to back to logandale"
abby yelled, "no! they went bye bye!"


oh no

"i'm jealous. i'm jealous of the baby."
"i want to be a baby again." -lucy


ftd stinks

so...for the flowers update. a new bouquet did come on monday. check it out:

yeah. these ones suck too. there aren't even any daisies this time. oh, and they sent a little note too.
"This bouquet has $15.00 more than you gave us. We hope you had a wonderful Mother's Day. Enjoy! Thanks for Shopping with us."

wow. when did carnations get so freaking expensive? honestly, does that look like a $65 dollar bouquet? and, hello, i am the customer. don't even try to pass the buck on me that i wasn't satisfied with the first one just on a whim. you did not give me the bouquet i ordered people! and no, i didn't have a good mother's day because my flowers were stuck in floral floam. and i hate, i mean hate carnations. they are the only flower i loathe and despise. i'm willing to look past a few as fillers, but not as the main event. whenever i see a carnation bouquet i think 3rd grade science project. you know, where you put the dye in the water and the carnation changes color. classy.
i am still waiting to hear a reply from email. but am calling today. i don't want any more flowers from this company, i want my money back.
and to repeat myself, this is what i ordered:


where have you been

nora ephron?
i knew i liked you, but didn't know just how much. i loved sleepless in seattle and you've got mail. but until i read your book (thanks a million Jandee), i wasn't in love with you. i think i love you. i think we could be very dear friends. if i could write like you, oh, to write like you. if i could write like you i think my world would be complete. i know it wouldn't, but i'd like to pretend it would be. i think i'm writing more like you right now. but honestly, i really did feel like i was reading the author i could be. you and i are quite similar in a lot ways. maybe everyone can relate to you. maybe not. it doesn't matter; you made me smile, and that's what matters.

i can't count how many times i laughed out loud reading I Feel Bad About My Neck. my poor sister happened to call me right during a funny paragraph, so of course, i read it to her too. and she laughed. maybe because i was laughing. but it doesn't matter. you are funny,and witty, and dry and perfect. thanks for a wonderful three hours of a worry free life.

one of my favorite quotes of the book:
Reading makes me feel I've accomplished something, learned something, become a better person. Reading makes me smarter. Reading gives me something to talk about later on. Reading is the unbelievably healthy way my attention deficit disorder medicates itself. Reading is escape, and the opposite of escape; it's a way to make contact with reality after a day of making things up, and it's a way of making contact with someone else's imagination after a day that's all too real...Reading is bliss.

but don't worry, it's not just about reading. it's great. it solidified my mom's advice to always moisturize your neck along with your face. thanks mom, i lathered up good this morning.

if you would like a lighthearted laugh. read this on a night when you don't want to focus on anything else. delightful.


that's $49?

i used some of our amex points for a floral gift certificate to order roses for our mommas. it took a long time to pick our exactly what we wanted sent, and ordered, only to find out this particular company cannot ship to their zip code. nice.

so, i took this as a ripe opportunity and gave myself flowers from my 'kids'. totally legit considering they can't drive to stores or buy me presents yet.

to make a long story short, these are what i ordered:

and this is what i received:

you can bet your cutie patooties that i called them and complained. i think this floral company has been ripping people off for holidays. i mean, you never really know what someone orders you right? no one's the wiser. unless, of course, you order them for yourself. you've got to love the tacky green floral foam in the clear vase. uck.
i'm expecting a nice, fatty, chic bouquet this afternoon. free of charge.



on the walk to the park yesterday a college co-ed passed by us running. this happens about 200 times a day so i didn't think anything of it. but this girl, turned and approached me. she was really sweet and said she is giving a talk on motherhood on sunday and was wondering if she could ask a few questions. standard single ward procedure.

i laughed at this point because
1) luckily everyone was in a good mood this morning. abby was holding my hand gently (not tugging and screaming and throwing a tantrum), lucy had her sophie bear and was looking for bugs and not interrupting, and i wasn't threatening to turn around and go home if they didn't hurry up. i'm pretty slow these days.
2) i don't think i'm ever in a position to give anyone advice on motherhood. i mean, c'mon, my kids are 4 and 2, i still have plenty of time to fail miserably.

Question #1: "what do you think is the most important thing that has helped you be a good mom?" hahaha. how on earth do you answer that question? could i ever pinpoint one thing, practice, principle, method that has helped me? no, but i did give her the best answer i could think of.


right now for me patience could best describe how i try to handle my kids and be a 'good' mother. whatever that means. patience with my children. patience with myself. patience with my spouse. patience with my Heavenly Father.

Question #2: "what is your best advice for younger girls to prepare them for motherhood?"

ok, i laughed at this one too. everyone is so different, at least all of my friends and acquaintances are. you can never gage whether someone is prepared or not for motherhood. it's kind of sink or swim, but not in a bad way. i promise : )

but i did remember some sage advice that i received from a dear friend when I was a young mother. this is the gist of it:

basically, she said, before you become a mother (and yes, even after) you should spend your time developing "you". spending time finding out who you are & investing time and education in that. your kids are blessed by this, because you won't live through them, but are happy to guide them and stand beside them and watch them grow. and then let them go.

some girls think that motherhood is going to complete them. that that is "who they are". but in reality, it is only a small part of who you are. you are you, your own self. you have your own personality, and talents, and likes and dislikes and callings in life. you have your own purpose to achieve on this earth. for some, one of those callings is motherhood. we get these precious babies, and are blessed with the opportunity to raise them. and then, guess what? they leave. yes, they are still your children, and you their mother, but someday, somewhere, you are going to be all by yourself again. if your sole purpose is to have children to 'complete you', that is a hard place to come from. it puts a lot of pressure on your children, and their children and a lot of pressure on you.

i really thought what she said was true (and i generalized it with my own thoughts). sometimes it's not all giggle and flowers. some days you all have the stomach flu, and there is only one toilet. haha. some days your children tell you they hate you and would rather live with anyone but you. but you know what, i still love being a mother. it truly is a blessing in my life. but i am not just a mother, i am me. and all that is encompasses a lot, and i can't wait to share any of my talents and interests and opinions with my children if they ever ask. and i am always trying to do the right thing when it comes to raising them. and sadly, so far, it has always meant the harder path, with more work for me and tyson in the beginning. but a lot more payoff in the end. phew. i learned that one from my dear, dear mom.

anyways, besides the jumbo rant and raving on this post. happy mother's day. especially to the two most important mothers in my life. my mother and my mother-in-law. and to all of you who are mothers. who have mothers. who want to someday be a mother. tomorrow you all deserve flowers, breakfast in bed, a foot massage and a slice of costco chocolate cake.


i don't want to know

heard from around the corner while the girls are bathing:

lucy: "oh my gosh and what the heck! abby's pooping abby pooped abby pooped! agh!"


x's and y's

"So what are you having?"
"Oh, we are leaving it a surprise."

that's all i hear these days. everyone is confused as to why we aren't finding out the sex of the baby. and you really only have about 2 sentences to explain yourself, and how can i?

how can i tell the stranger the reasoning behind not finding out the sex? and trust me, we really are not finding out. we have already had 6 ultrasounds, and 3 of them we had to look away.

it's hard for me to put into words why. does it make any sense? no. it actually makes no sense. if i knew what the baby was i could start planning. i would know what color boppy cover to buy/or get out of storage. and diaper changing table pad, and blankets and clothes and bedding and binkies and toys. and of course, we have 2 girls, so if it were a boy i would need a lot of stuff.

i always thought i would have all boys. my entire life i saw myself surrounded by dump trucks and blocks and smashed toys. and now, i am so grateful that i am surrounded with tutus and dresses and dancing, smiling girls. how could i ever wish my girls were boys? i couldn't. i never have. so it honestly doesn't matter to me whether it's a boy or girl.
my first doctor said it's best to find out because they have had some major freak outs in the delivery rooms where crazy moms were sure it was something else and weren't prepared for the alternative. that is sad, no?

but now, i feel like with this pregnancy the only thing i have any control over is finding out the sex of the baby. really, i don't have much agency or decisions over how things are going, or will go. the doctors call all the shots and we are playing the waiting game. hoping it will be a great,big, chunky, full-term little butterball.

and preparing for the worst. i had a nightmare the other night that we had a 24week old baby. oh my, it was horrible. you would never wish that upon anyone. the tubes, and beeping, and machines, and nurses shuffling feet and quiet knocks on the door. i woke up terrified. but for now, i am holding in there, and enjoying my healthy children as much as possible.

i so look forward to that moment when i look at ty and he tells me what it is when he sees the baby. i want to meet this baby for the first time when it comes into this world. i want to hold it, and love it, and gaze at it and then decide on a name and start make believing what they are going to be like, look like and do.

and that is a small explanation of why we aren't finding out. i can say that we get mucho props from all the ultrasound techs. i think mainly because it is so rare to have someone not finding out, and maybe because they like knowing and keeping a secret. everyone loves secrets right? who knows. have you ever not found out?


more pics

my parents just sold their second practice within the year. yes, my dad has worked 2 jobs since he was 16. i guess once you hit 69 it's ok to just have one. so with all their free time they have planted a sick garden and are raising the poshest chickens in town. the girls fed and cared for them every day. (don't worry, i cleaned them thoroughly after each visit)
the view from my parents' porch

here is abby when she tells them to "here! peck me! peck me!" my mom told her pecks are kisses. woops.

abby's attempt to get on the swings by herself
grandma leavitt and lucy (we were trying on future halloween costumes)
this is what i love about staying at my mom's. you wake up and have sweet little flowers like this in your bathroom.

road trips and such

the last week and a half has been quite the blur. ty finished up winter semester (woohoo!) and had a weekend break. his family celebrates high school graduates by taking them to disneyland. this year his sister graduates, last year his cousin graduated, and the year before we went for his brother before his mission. we have gone 3 years in a row. whew. i can say that i have pretty much mastered the traveling in the car/packing food/staying in hotel rooms with kids thing. but i am done. i need a break from travel and disneyland.
here are some great pics from disneyland. it was a blast

here is the one and only picture of me in all my glory.
the wheelchair is how you get around disneyland on partial bedrest without ticking off your dr. : )
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