i'm stalling by stalling

this move last month was awful. i don't think i've ever written about how absolutely horrible it was, and if it wasn't for all the help we received from friends and families, it would have been oh so many times more horrible. i shudder to think about it.
why was it so horrible? because i was unprepared. when we moved up to school- i was an organizing queen bee. boxes packed, taped, labeled, color coordinated, numbered! maybe it was the anti-depressants i was on, but i was on the ball baby. and this move? well, i pretty much just stuck my head in the sand and refused to believe i had to go. it's not that i didn't want to live where we live now. i do! i do! and it isn't that i didn't want to live closer to family. i did! i did! but i was a selfish little girl and wanted everything all at once. i wanted to live close to all my bosom friends and beautiful mountains AND live on our property here and close to family and a steady job for tyson. is that too much to ask?
but the denial was evident all around me, but not until moving day. i saw the sympathetic looks in my friends' eyes when they saw the mountains of stuff still lying all over. in my head i thought, "oh, i'll just move that tomorrow", or "take the beds down in the morning", or "throw that in a box first thing". which added up to a monumental disaster. ty's poor family sweated away all day moving furniture, throwing stuff in boxes and taking down curtains and furniture, and spraying down the mouse poop in the basement. i think mouse poop in the basement is worse than snakes on a plane.
i remember standing there with my sister and saying, "well, apparently i've been blogging instead of packing". and it was true. sometimes, (shh, don't tell anyone else although i'm sure they already know because most of my super efficient and go getter friends don't blog half as much as  i do) i blog instead of getting things done. LIKE RIGHT NOW. phoebe is screeching because she's done with 'that' toy and i'm still typing. ok, i took care of it.
but really, last night i was thinking about writing on the blog and it struck me. i'm doing it again. blogging instead of doing. i have trim to paint and curtains to hang and food to cook and errands to run and i keep putting it off.
like the list is so long that it will never get finished, so why start? silly me, it will get done. and luckily all the projects will patiently wait for me and not go anywhere. and i should add, that the girls and i are having a bang up time playing with the kitties and taking walks to count all the bunnies and baby quails (baby quails i heart). and in that grand scheme of things, i am VERY lucky right now. if these are my problems du jour than i will take them thank you very much. there is so much pain and sorrow and heartache and disappointment in the world, who am i to complain about digging up flower beds?
so here's to a new day. a day of turning off the computer till after bedtime, because those emails can wait, because my babies want to play with me, and because life is more important than facebook status'.

and sorry provo- but the view from my back porch was never as amazing as this one


Tam said...

Perfectly said. I don't know what else to add except you just wrote out what I have thought/felt/told myself a million times. I love the picture. Thanks and sincere good luck to you. Happy doing!

The Leavitts said...

My favorite thing to do when i am suppose to be doing something useful is blogging or blog stalking!!!

The Leavitts said...

And i would really like to become a stalker of your house blog to, please!!!!

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