2.27.2013

Our story: the Love word

In honor of our tenth anniversary, i'm writing down "our story":
part one
part two
part three

There are three words every girl wants to hear, and then when it happens it freaks you out. Right? It did me. Ty told me he loved me first (I know!). A few weeks, a month after Junior year started? I don't know, remember it was 15 years ago? Tyson drove me home one night and I said, "You know? I think I like you a lot". And that handsome stud of a boy who never talks said, "I think I love you a lot."

Just like that, the L word. I was aghast. I couldn't say anything, I just kissed him goodnight and went inside. That quiet boy said he loved me! I think I was definitely in the liking phase by then. But love? I didn't think I was quite there yet.

I knew I really liked him, and enjoyed dating him. But love? This wasn't in my master plan. Yes, I had a master plan. Before 15 it was to become a principal dancer at ABT. After 16 it was to go to BYU, meet my husband, get married and live in a city (preferably Chicago, thank you very much). He would wear a suit and be an accountant or doctor, and I would be the quintessential suburbia soccer mom.

But loving and marrying a small town boy? No ma'am.

And then something happened, we kept dating. I kept liking him more and more, and more and more. Heaven help me, is this love? I couldn't decide, until that spring. I had a horrible tonsillectomy and recovery. I'm talking horrible people, like couldn't eat solids for weeks, or talk, and when I did I sounded like Chewbacca and my breath could kill a large mammal. I've never smelt anything as defiled as that, ever. I couldn't' go to school, I hadn't showered, things were not pretty. My mom came in one night and as she helped me eat I lamented that after that first day home, no one had come to see me. She looked at me quizzically and said, "Didn't you know Tyson was here today?". "He was?" I asked. I didn't remember it at all (Stupid Codein). "Honey, he's been here every day at lunch time. He doesn't eat anything,  he just comes and sits here and then goes back to school".

That's when I knew. Any 17 year old boy that would come every day and watch my slovenly state sleep in sickness was a boy I could love. And I did, I fell madly in love with him.

So now we were both in love. And 17 year old practicing Mormons. Which meant there was nothing to do about it. If that isn't a trial I don't know what is. We both knew we would marry in the temple, so getting jiggy with it wasn't in the cards.  Oh, those were difficult years, and I would never wish that upon anyone. Knowing you were in love, and that you want to marry that person (but not dare saying it out loud) and also knowing that there was 5 years at least until you could marry and actually "love" each other. Oi vey. That might be a special place in hell, right next to the "perpetually pregnant and moving houses" section.

Anyways, long story short, we survived. We beat the odds, and went through a lot of suffering so that Lucy isn't 13 years old. And THAT is why I don't ever want my kids to fall in love in high school. Romantic in theory, practically impossible in practice.

Sometimes I'm glad we entered love so early, just because our friendship grew so strong early on. Because the hand holding and kissing took forever we were friends first. He has, and still is my best friend for 15 years. But we have a lot in common, and I thought and still think his life was fascinating. And vice versa.

He was the country boy, I was the city girl. He introduced me to Crusty Demons of Dirt,  NOFX and offroading.  I exposed him to Led Zeppelin, Steve Miller Band and Shakespeare.

A match made in heaven.
Oh my, how on earth did we actually turn out?
We were pretty stingy for using the L word over the next years until marriage. Special occasions, hard times, but not every day. Not in passing, not over the phone or in public. Now that we are married? Every single day, multiple times a day depending on what's going on. Every since our friend Shawn passed when we were 25, Tyson has never left for work without waking me up and telling me he loves me. You just never know.



3 comments:

Jed Wheeler Family said...

You better love me too cuz I may never forget the tonsil job.
Good post.

gaylene said...

I just stumbled onto your blog. This story is so sweet. It's so unusual to find "the one" so early. Love it :)

Lori said...

Love the blog and love you both!

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