Vacation? No. Trip? Yes.

Before Christmas we agreed to meet up with the Erkillas (Ty's MTC companion) for a camping trip.

This weekend was it, we went we saw we hiked. The kids had a blast, I slept about 6 hrs between the last two nights. Beautiful views though. Goblin valley Utah was a kids dream. They all ran, and ran and ran around free as little birdies. Very family friendly and they could climb everywhere. We also hiked little Wildhorse Canyon right afterwards. Event though we were tired, Ty and I and the kids loved the slot canyons we went through.

We really had a great time, and we are glad we went, even though we got home at midnight last night! (ugh-horrible Easter sunday because of that) It was fun to visit with friends and get away from the chores, but I'm still sticking by my mantra, anywhere you go with kids is not a vacation: it's a trip.

Anywhere you go without the kids? Vacation! And we might have one brewing for our anniversary this month!

Which reminds me, time to finish our "story" on this thingy.

In the meantime, don't come over to my house for 3 days. It's a disaster zone.


crazy. happy. crazy happy.

Goofing off in college

I have writers block. I've written post after post and can't push publish. I'm eating gluten and sugar and feel miserable. One minute I'm blissfully happy and can't believe how blessed my life is, and the next I want to hide under the covers and can't even imagine having any more children....ever.

Tell me you have weeks/months/years(?) like this too?

In other news I read some good books lately, and have been on a roll. Unbroken and The Hiding Place, just fed my hunger for WWII history even more. They were amazing, and harrowing and made me feel like even more of a loser, but in a good way. I love historical non-fiction, my sister Sarah would hate those books. If your looking for a quick, fun read, I enjoyed Icefall for my book club I'm in. I read My Name is Asher Lev again, and loved it even more the second time around.  I'm fascinated with the lives of religious artists, where the lines are between the two and where you end up. Do the lines blur? Or dissapear altogether? I often see people either giving up their art, or giving up their religion, either a little, or altogether.

 I'm in need of a new good book, but Middle March looks very daunting and slow sitting on my counter, so I haven't touched it.


Don't give up

We are here and life is good. We've been inflicted with conjunctivitis and wonderful weather, so lots of solitary days outside.

Hope to return to blogging soon.


Day four: babysitting

I watched the Terril girls and it helped phoebe and Rodney a lot. They played all afternoon together, but it was hot outside! Almost 90* already? What?

When Rodney napped they asked for a movie and I let them watch a scholastic book movie, because hey, it's just like books right? Right? It was all for 45 minutes and then over. I got some good cleaning done in the meantime.

We visited both grandmas and had the ballet class drive which is always fun to get in and out of the car 8 times in 2 hrs with 2 car seats just so fun fun fun.


Day three : storm settles

It was a good day, phoebe didn't even ask about the tv. We spent the morning organizing my parents garage and then went home to collapse.

Someone tell me how they do things away from home and still cook and clean? Because I think it's impossible. I love staying home and need to be here to manage everything. and I have enough to do here I never wander around bored if you know what I mean. Ha, as if.

I'm other news we want to teacher night at mcds via drive through and saw both our teachers. Success! I am really sore this week from Zumba, the stress of some stuff is gone and I'm having a blast. We have la few friends having babies right now and it's fun! But I'm happy it's not me, is that bad to share?

Ps...this picture solidifies my suspicion that my kids inherited the Curtis goof gene:


Day two: almost broke

Holy cow, how did I survive the day? I really didn't think it would be hard, beautiful sunny day! We went for a walk, played outside, jumped on the trampoline, play dough, read books, painted rocks and I still wanted to claw my eyes out.

How did this happen? How did my kids lose all ability of entertaining themselves? The house is a wreck, I can't get anything done, is this the part where it gets worse before it gets better?

Please tell me it is.

At least I rearranged my painting wall.


Day one: withdrawals

The older girls were fine with no tv or computer. It took phoebe 2 hours to stop crying about it. after our walk and after playing outside, I offered some choices. " phoebe, we can play play dough? Or do dress ups?" She looked at me and screamed "I DON'T WANT TO DO ANYTHING!!"

so, we have some issues with tv addiction here. They got so bored they ate apples lying down on the porch. And dressed up rhino in hair clippies.

Once daddy was home it was smooth sailing, 4 wheeler rides, dinner, visiting the Terrill's and bed.

Ty and me? We caved and watched an episode of arrested development. I know!

it's that time of year...brace yourselves

it's turn off the tv week again.

and i don't know if we'll suvive.

since i started cleaning my house, the kids watch about an hour of tv every morning. and in the afternoon when I make dinner and help with homework, and now....well. We'll just to adapt and survive right?

right now as I type Rodney just dumped the entire box of corn chex on the floor and we're listening to Ralph's World and I'm ready to gouge my eyes out.

Now do we do ALL screens? Holy cow I think we'd die, but I want to try. It's just one week right? right.  How did our grandmas do it? 

Aunt Linda, mom, Uncle Bill, Aunt Brenda, Christmas 1948 pre-tv. I'm positive Grandma made all those dresses too.



Well, that last post was a downer. But thanks for all the kind words.

I'm going to share something personal, but it's good I promise. I've been praying more to feel God's love. I've always known he loves everyone, but sometimes it's hard to imagine that He loves me. For who I am, and all my thoughts, and all my mistakes and all that I am. That He knows me personally, and still could love me.

In the beginning I was frustrated. I wasn't feeling anything special, no grand manifestations or an outpouring of love.

When I did stop to open my eyes, I saw a steady stream of things I'm grateful for that show His love.

My children, my husband, my family, my friends, my beautiful home and trees and leaves that I listen to rustling at night. Most importantly the people that care about me. Within a week Grandma Joyce brought me a beautiful table runner for St. Patrick's day and the most perfect bib for Rodney in the world.

And then I would talk to a friend, or they would let me stay at their house and whine and not clean my house for an hour.  Or let me call and vent for 45 minutes. Talk about manifestations of love!

I started my reading that I planned and wouldn't you know? Every talk was exactly what I needed to hear. Almost down to the tiniest detail, it was almost scary. He does know me.  little ol', insignificant and flawed me.

We had close friends over Sunday night and my house overflowed with love. How lucky we are to have old friends to laugh with and grow old with. It means the world to me. I wish I could see all my friends all the time, but I'm grateful for modern day technology that we stay in touch in so many different ways. But ahem, all you that read this and feel "close" to me, but don't have a blog? Text me and say hi! I want to hear about your lives also, dur.

Rachelle stopped by and gave Phoebe the cutest dress my heart almost burst. And Phoebe even took off her swimming suit to wear it. Miracle of miracles.

And so many other things, and texts, and phone calls and hugs, that I think right now, that is how Heavenly Father is talking to me. That he truly does know me, and knows my needs and if I just ask, He is there. Maybe not how I want, but exactly how I need.

Having my mom close is one of the things I am grateful for every day. She's a top notch lady that one.


can we talk?

I have neglected writing a lot lately, about, well, life. Have you noticed? I didn't really, until I read this post from Joshlyn. I'm always delighted with her writing and remember why she is my friend. Witty, pretty, smart and loyal. Her voice is wonderful in her writing.

Do I even have a voice any more in my writing?

I haven't written a lot because lately I've been dissapointed a lot, and mad a lot, and frustrated a lot, and sad a lot and everything that I don't want people to read about a lot.

For example, my depression that always rears up around Jan/Feb didn't come in Janurary! Huzzah! And then it face palmed me in February. Boo. I went to a nutritionist to get some advice on what I was eating that might be affecting it? Other than my sugar that i've been cheating on off and on (I know, I know, don't lecture me). Besides the sugar? She suggested GLUTEN. You have got to be kidding me! I exclaimed. It sent me into a spiral, not only dairy, and sugar but now gluten are forbidden . Did you know? Gluten is in absolutely everything. It made me so upset that that night I had chinese food with ty and ate everything on the menu with sugar AND gluten in it.

Take that nutritionist lady. Pshaw.

Anyways, I bought some holy batman expensive almond flour (thanks keshia) and it's ok. We've had pancakes and I'm hoping to make banana bread when my stomach bug settles down (I know, again!).  Costco sold some vegan gluten free cookie dough and it's not too bad. But I forgot that me+cookie dough=ravenous eating spree. The two of us cannot be trusted together. It's not you cookie dough, it's me. Or maybe it's you? I just don't know anymore.

I teach the 6 year old primary class now, and they are the cutest little bunch of kids. Great families, great class, but I'm exhausted. It's hard at the end of the week to muster up 2 hours of happiness and glee and teaching out of a well that's empty. Which means I need to up my personal upkeep with spiritual matters. I've been slacking, but we have an amazing sunday school teacher and relief society, and those 2 hours would give me the boost I needed to get through the week. So no more lazy pants for me, I'm following Mel and reading the November 2012 ensign before General Conference next month.

In other news, I've had a lot of frustration with teaching Zumba lately.   **DON"T EVER BLOG ABOUT WORK!!! I forgot my rule : )

And last but not least, I hate that I got my iphone. It takes away so much of my time from my kids and Ty. I've settled down a lot with it, but I hate that i've become so lazy with it. I don't look up directions or addresses or numbers anymore. I don't write things down and I hardly EVER take pictures with a real camera either. Bah. I need a good phone that can text easily and make phone calls. Why did I switch?

And to top it all of with a nice cherry on top, I found a new lump in my chest and had to get it checked out. If that wasn't stressful I don't know what is. Luckily, just another new lump to add to the others. I guess they wanted another friend.

Phew. I'm done.
I wore my robe almost every morning last week sending the kids on the bus. 
I can't wait to hear about that in 20 years.


seen and heard

 catching phoebe during a sweet moment
 baby's obsessions are mounting: 4 wheelers and On any Sunday
 Borrowed a book full of great quotes from Grandma Joyce

the weather turned from lovely to spectacular over night- 
we are having fun in the sun- literally
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