I'm going to share something personal, but it's good I promise. I've been praying more to feel God's love. I've always known he loves everyone, but sometimes it's hard to imagine that He loves me. For who I am, and all my thoughts, and all my mistakes and all that I am. That He knows me personally, and still could love me.
In the beginning I was frustrated. I wasn't feeling anything special, no grand manifestations or an outpouring of love.
When I did stop to open my eyes, I saw a steady stream of things I'm grateful for that show His love.
My children, my husband, my family, my friends, my beautiful home and trees and leaves that I listen to rustling at night. Most importantly the people that care about me. Within a week Grandma Joyce brought me a beautiful table runner for St. Patrick's day and the most perfect bib for Rodney in the world.
And then I would talk to a friend, or they would let me stay at their house and whine and not clean my house for an hour. Or let me call and vent for 45 minutes. Talk about manifestations of love!
I started my reading that I planned and wouldn't you know? Every talk was exactly what I needed to hear. Almost down to the tiniest detail, it was almost scary. He does know me. little ol', insignificant and flawed me.
We had close friends over Sunday night and my house overflowed with love. How lucky we are to have old friends to laugh with and grow old with. It means the world to me. I wish I could see all my friends all the time, but I'm grateful for modern day technology that we stay in touch in so many different ways. But ahem, all you that read this and feel "close" to me, but don't have a blog? Text me and say hi! I want to hear about your lives also, dur.
Rachelle stopped by and gave Phoebe the cutest dress my heart almost burst. And Phoebe even took off her swimming suit to wear it. Miracle of miracles.
And so many other things, and texts, and phone calls and hugs, that I think right now, that is how Heavenly Father is talking to me. That he truly does know me, and knows my needs and if I just ask, He is there. Maybe not how I want, but exactly how I need.
Having my mom close is one of the things I am grateful for every day. She's a top notch lady that one.
2 comments:
Annie, You are such an awesome friend to know. I pray that you will be able to continue to see ways that show God's love for you and your family. I think as mothers with all the love that we are so willing to give, it seems hardest to find time to see that we are His daughters whom he loves and blesses every day.
Oh Annie, I like you lots lots lots.
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